Don’t Listen to Your Mother (A Letter to My Boys)

Dear Boys,

I think it is important to prepare you for the time when you become an adult and your mother is still clinging to the backs of your shirts every time that you leave me. I am sure to be annoying, overbearing, and a bit neurotic. It’s sort of a mom tradition.

But, that’s my problem. Not yours.

Grown men don’t need their mothers as much as little boys do.  You won’t need my advice or opinion on everything.  I won’t do your laundry or clean up after you (that, I can promise.) But, I will likely still feel the need to tell you what I think about, well, lots of things.  I promise to try and keep a lid on it, however.

In any case, I know my own nature combined with my deep and intense love for you may make me “one of those moms” sometimes. When you move out, I will miss you the way that you would miss a limb, or your own kidney.  I may be an absolute mess.  But, before I lose my mind, I want you to know this:

Ignore me.  

Please don’t ignore me about whether or not to change your oil, or making sure to always take a cab home from the bar.  But, when and if, I start trying to stick my nose in about your career choices, your homes, or (PUT ME IN A STRAIGHTJACKET FOR THIS ONE) your dating life; tell me (respectfully, please) to get a life.   It is not that my advice will be bad, necessarily.  It’s just that I am not you.

Your life is yours.  You deserve to get to enjoy the magic of every experience that you desire.  You should kiss every girl (or boy, of course) that you want.  Ignore my preaching about nutrition.  Eat piles of McDonald’s on your dorm room floor at 2 am.  Buy clothes with money you should use for groceries. Get a new car that is not worth the money.  Wear clothing that your father and I hate.

In short, do you.

Life is all about finding yourself and moving in the direction of your truth.  That’s no easy task.  So, do it bravely and never let me (or your dad) say anything to discourage you from doing the things that make you the happiest.

This life is oh so short, and very precious.  I desperately, more than you may ever know, want for you to enjoy yours. If you can do that, then mama will sleep better at night.

But, whether or not I sleep well is none of your concern.  Just ignore me.

Love you sooooo much,



More Stuff for YOU:

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My Kids are Weird



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